Friendship used to feel deeply ingrained in daily life. You saw people at work, at school, at the local bar, or just hanging around the neighborhood. Now it often feels like something extra, something you schedule if there is time left.
Humans still crave connection, deeply. However, the way modern life operates makes friendship harder to initiate, harder to maintain, and easier to abandon. That is why many researchers now say we are living through a friendship recession, and the numbers support this claim.
Reports show that in 1990, only 3% of American adults said they had no close friends. Today, that number sits at about 12%.
At the same time, the group of people with ten or more close friends has shrunk fast. It has fallen by nearly two-thirds over the same period. Fewer people have wide circles. Many have none at all. This is not evenly spread either. Working-class Americans are getting hit the hardest. In 2024, about 26% of adults with only a high school education reported having no close friends.
This happened before lockdowns. COVID only sped things up. Nearly half of Americans say they lost touch with at least a few friends during the pandemic, and many never rebuilt those ties.
Work, Money & the Vanishing Middle Ground
One big reason is structural pressure. Work now consumes a greater portion of life than it used to. Americans work longer hours than people in most other wealthy countries. Jobs also demand more mental space, even after the workday ends.
Parenting adds another layer. Modern parenting culture pushes constant involvement. Every hour gets optimized for kids. That leaves little energy for adult friendships. Not surprisingly, work has become the most common place people make close friends, because it is the only place they see others regularly.
Then there’s the fading of third spaces. Cafes, parks, community centers, and informal hangouts are disappearing—or becoming less inviting. These spaces once allowed spontaneous social interaction. Without them, connecting with friends takes planning, money, and real intention. That raises the bar, and many people quietly drift away.
Technology Changed Everything
Teenagers illustrate the shift starkly. Around twenty years ago, they spent about 140 minutes daily socializing outside school; today, that number hovers around 40 minutes. The difference is significant. Real-life interaction teaches skills that screens cannot: interpreting tone, managing silence, responding in the moment.
Online friendships train other muscles. Texting and messaging reward speed and precision. You can pause, rewrite, and avoid awkward moments. That feels comfortable, but it’s shallower. Neuroscience shows that hearing a familiar voice reduces stress and triggers bonding hormones. Text simply doesn’t replicate that effect.
Studies of adults over 50 have even found that mental well-being improves with weekly face-to-face time, rather than with calls or texts.
Even worse, there is AI companionship on the rise now. Many teens now talk to chatbots for fun, comfort, or emotional release.
For some people, that can feel like relief. But it also removes the give and take that real friendships require. Human bonds grow through effort, missteps, and repair. AI skips all of that. Over time, relying on friction-free connections may make real relationships feel exhausting by comparison.